Walking Away

Don’t let problems you can’t solve grow inside of you.

I’ve been struggling with family issues that kept trying to take me out. No really. It felt like I would get up in the morning and before I could even get started these issues would punch me in the face and bring me to my knees. When I would find the strength to lift myself back up there they were again in full force just waiting to knock me out again. I have found through my experience that it is ten times harder to get through this type of conflict when your identity is deeply rooted in your family. For me, it was with my large family that I learned how to form my first sentence, speak two languages at once, and serve people around me who didn’t have basic necessities.

I was a daughter, sister, and niece before I was a career woman and girlfriend. I never thought in a million years that those two things would conflict for the people I loved. As I grew older, I started seeing the imperfections that existed in my family. I felt like I was up against a wall when it came to generational gaps. One day I got tired of it. I was sick of waking up and feeling like I had no energy because of things outside of my control.

Nor do I want to control my family. I don’t want to force them to be the people I think they should be. More this, less of that. As if they were a recipe that could be adjusted at my will. Let me tell you…